Colin Powell to Endorse Obama

Holy shit balls, it looks like this might actually be the case. Here's the thing: Matt Yglesias and Kevin Drum (both support Obama but predict that Hillary will win) can try and predict who the winner is going to be in this primary. A lot of people can try and predict that. But there's still a ton of things that you just can't predict. That's the game of politics. And Yglesias even admits that predictions are a "mug's game." So I've got to say, I'm supporting Obama, I don't know who's going to win, and I think predicting who's going to win is a pretty tough thing to do at this point.

Bad Therapist

Client: I'm struggling with anxiety.
Bad Therapist: Well then maybe you should chill the fuck out.

Client: I'm having a lot of problems with my parents.
Bad Therapist: Oh okay. Hey you know friend, I've got some advice you okay. It's a very important line from a very important book. You ready for this pal: 'Honor thy father and thy mother!'

Client: I keep regressing back to the simpler days of childhood.
Bad Therapist: Grow up.

Huckabee's Major

Mike Huckabee says the following

"I know the pundits, and I know what they say: The math doesn't work out," Huckabee said Saturday morning at the Conservative Political Action Conference in Washington. "Well, I didn't major in math; I majored in miracles. And I still believe in those, too."

Now I've got to admit: I wanted to make fun of the Governor for this quote. So I did a Wikipedia search on Huckabee to find put his college major thinking, "well, well, Mr. Huckabee! Turns out you majored in political science! Gotchya!"

But it turns out that he majored in Religion. And I imagine he thinks of that as majoring in miracles. So I'm a bit salty as the Governor's story checks out.

George Bush

If Hillary Clinton wins the nomination and then the general election that means we go George Bush-Clinton-George Bush-Clinton. By the end of her second term I'll be over 35. At that time I will change my name to George Bush and run for president saying, "It's time to put a George Bush back in the White House."

Arlen Specter

So Senator Specter is all, "I'm mad at the NFL! They threw out tapes. That sucks. That's like the CIA throwing out tapes."

I can understand that Arlen is mad about this shit. But I still don't understand why there is any energy going into the NFL when there's a genocide going on in Darfur. Yes. How annoying we Darfur activists are. Always pooping on the party. But the fact is, there is a genocide going on in Darfur and the President of the United States has done so little to match his rhetoric around this that it's kind of mind boggling.

I think the NFL should maybe get less of a priority Senator Specter. I mean, I'm all for accountability but let's prioritize, you know.

What About Farting Embarrasses You?

I'm no longer embarrassed about farting in front of most people. I find the sound pretty funny and I'm proud of myself when my ass starts to talk. What I'm embarrassed about is when my fart smells. Then I feel like me and any one near me has to sit around for three minutes getting familiar with the smell of my shit. That makes me uncomfortable.

Huckabee's Major

Mike Huckabee says the following

"I know the pundits, and I know what they say: The math doesn't work out," Huckabee said Saturday morning at the Conservative Political Action Conference in Washington. "Well, I didn't major in math; I majored in miracles. And I still believe in those, too."

Now I've got to admit: I wanted to make fun of the Governor for this quote. So I did a Wikipedia search on Huckabee to find put his college major thinking, "well, well, Mr. Huckabee! Turns out you majored in political science! Gotchya!"

But it turns out that he majored in Religion. And I imagine he thinks of that as majoring in miracles. So I'm a bit salty as the Governor's story checks out.